Kate and Trish Varnum, lead plaintiffs in Iowa's same-sex marriage case

Kate and Trish Varnum, lead plaintiffs in Iowa's same-sex marriage case

Trish Varnum, who is now planning a quiet fall wedding, had a difficult time keeping her emotions under control while speaking to Iowa Independent by phone Friday morning.

Trish and her longtime partner, Kate Varnum, were lead plaintiffs in the case that led to a complete striking of an Iowa law that defined marriage as being between one man and one woman.

“You cannot believe how nervous we were last night,” Trish said. “We had everyone here (in Des Moines) and, honestly, we just had a very difficult time getting any sleep. There was a very optimistic atmosphere, but, at that same time, there was always a little ‘what if’ voice in the back of your head.

“I can’t even tell you in words the feelings we experienced (when the decision was announced). Everyone was just in tears. It was so emotionally gratifying to finally be acknowledged as a full citizen of this state with all associated rights and benefits.”

The couple, residents of Cedar Rapids in eastern Iowa, had previously told Iowa Independent that their focus was not on history. While Trish maintains that their part in this legal battle was done for personal reasons, she’s also ready to accept the fact that their fight will forever be linked with the struggle of same-sex marriage advocates.

“I’m really proud of that fact,” she said. “I’m proud that our names will always be linked with this (legal case). This is a victory for everyone in Iowa — whether they realize it or not. Iowa was the state where this was always meant to be.”

Recounting the numerous ways that Iowa has led the national conversation — from being first in the nation with the Iowa caucuses to advancing civil rights well before landmark decisions were handed down by the U.S. Supreme Court — Trish said that historically it is appropriate and logical for Iowa to set a precedent on marriage equality.

“I’m so proud to be a part of Iowa once again leading the way, and I know Kate is as well,” she said. “Making history in this way? Well, I’ll be honest and say that I never expected my name would appear in a history book. But with this situation … well, I’m all about that. We cannot be more proud to be a part of this.”

While there might be some couples who move quickly to attain an Iowa marriage license following the court-imposed 21-day waiting period, Kate and Trish won’t be among them. The couple, who already had a larger ceremony, will wait until this fall to quietly make their married status legal in Iowa.

“We’ve done the big event,” Trish said. “And, I know people will likely take this the wrong way, but we feel in our hearts that we are already married in the eyes of God. So, we will do what we have to do to take care of this legal aspect, but it will just be family and close friends.”

Trish said that as a couple, she and Kate already have “everything we need,” and encouraged those who want to send wedding gifts to instead consider a donation to either Lambda Legal, the national gay and transgendered legal advocacy group that tried the case, or One Iowa, a statewide equality task force.

“The work they have done on behalf of us and on behalf of all the people of Iowa has been outstanding,” she said. “It was their hard work that made today possible, and we cannot thank them enough.”

After releasing a contented sigh, she added: “It’s a new day in Iowa.”